to new beginnings ·
17 April 11

to new beginnings and all that it brings us. i finally met spiritual match i think. a girl that drives me wild when she’s not around, and inspires me to write this when she is. today i met her sister, and got to know her. but more importantly i got to know this girl a little more, and she has so many redeeming facets hat i find no fault with her. sometimes she can be hard on herself, but i hope i can get to know her more and learn more about her, as well as perhaps, in my foolishness, to guide her. i dont know if i can, but i hope i can help her realise the potential within her, and the beauty she really is.

i must be mad, because it’s not everyday you meet people you connect with, to join a wavelength that whether drug induced or sober, actually makes you think. she’s absolutely incredible. i learnt so much about her, yet i know so little. but in my pursuit and ongoing thirst for knowledge i am determined to know this person, because she is worth the time, the effort, the commitment to get to know.

have i finally found someone i can link with spiritually and mentally? i absolutely adore her. she makes me so happy. i feel on top of the world. i feel, crazed, like a madman with afever that permeates throughout his body, a fever that cannot be quenched by water, by medicine, by thought or prayer. it’s intoxicating to feel something you have never felt before. yes i’ve enjoyed time i have spent with other girls, yes i have tried almost every drug known to man or beast, but there is one drug that cannot be injected, smoked or snorted.

it cannot be dilute because it is pure of heart, and soul. i have found someone i can finally open up to, to share my thoughts and understandings with. whether she feels the same way, i do not know. she has never expressed this to me, but even if this in unrequited love, it is something i must cherish and hold on to and remember, because it will never happen again. i lie. i don’t believe it may never happen again. i do believe that there are very few people you have soul connection with, and my heart beats, it palpitates and rumbles at her presence. it feeds off her.

but this is not the be all and all of what i feel and comprehend. i know this feeling must all be pure of heart without agenda and without want. i will let things happen and develop and see where they go. i have some expectations as only humans do it is within our nature to. i just hope this isnt the end, but the beginning