when we meet ·
11 August 06

Oh this is going to be awkward isn’t it? THere’ll be me, yourself and of course your new boyfriend. I know I said I didn’t mind him being there or coming along, but I do a bit. I mean it’s going to be a three way thing with an ex-boyfriend and your current one at the same table, with you.

I have to question what you’re thinking, perhaps you want to compare what you have to what you gave up? Or perhaps you’re testing me? I might be becoming paranoid and none of this is actually part of the plan, and that you’re genuinly just wanting us to get on together.

Thing is I can’t ask you questions in depth about yourself, things that I don’t know but want to know about, but can’t ask simply because your new boyfriend is there. What are we supposed to talk about? The weather? How great London is, and how boring Singapore is? What am I supposed to say? How am I supposed to behave?

I don’t want you back, I don’t need you back, but I am bothered about you’ve decided to set up this arrangement the way you have. Besides, what does the new guy know about you and your past? Does he know more than me? I don’t mind that, if he knows less than me, like your female relationships, and your alternative lifestyle. These are things I don’t want to bring up, just in case they show you up, or do something similar in result.

I guess I’ll sleep on it.