I feel incredibly sick, and have been suffering from nausea for the past few days. This has all come about because I haven’t taken my medication for the past four days. I say haven’t, but it would be more appropriate to say I couldn’t take my medication.
Due to the Easter break, my parents royally fucked up and forgot to get my prescription. Had I know they were prone to fucking things up this badly I would have sorted things myself. They have not understood the effect it has taken upon me, and to be honest I was not expecting this...
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I don’t feel fine, I don’t feel good, and I am out of cocaine. Rather than using it every now and then, I ended up doing several lines at once. I wanted the gear to last for a while, maybe a week, but there’s just never enough cocaine to satisfy.
Perhaps I’m paying for that indulgence now. I’m not a coke addict, I hadn’t touched the stuff for months, and even when I was off coke, I had not gotten much better than I was. I was still having days like the one I’m having today.
It’s partly because that I have...
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I’m going fucking mad here. I’ve spent most of the day fighting with the voice regarding my appointment with the psych today. I got up at 5am from sleeping very badly. I had an instant migraine, which lasted a few hours this morning.
It’s like everything has become an enormous giant step to take, even for the most trivial of things. What I mean by that is that being able to feel comfortable about travelling, not being so frightened or paranoid about other people around me, about what they might do to me, and what I may do to them.
But I...
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